My shelves are full of memories, from happy times to less happy times, from reality and from fantasy, from glory and romance to crime and punishment. I feel old for having so many things to remember…
To me the expression "going on a journey through memory lane" seems to cut it too "short". I always feel like my life was so filled, but now is just a disappointing wreckage of the speeding cart it once was. More than I can possible count I hoped for never land, my kingdom of fantasy, where I would restore forever in my youth, dreaming playing and finding an adventure somewhere behind a mountain, beneath the ocean; over the sky, and beyond the canyon. Huff… But none of that's possible…
"CARPE DIEM!!" I hear loud and clear from people of interest, "death does not take a breather just because you when in a trip via memory auto way". But no matter how true it is that doesn't change the fact I wish I was innocent like I was once, to the time where going to class did not felt like pulling a gun to my brain and shoot every twenty seconds, when boredom wasn't even a known word and if we felt like something wasn't fun, we would get up and run around it making it more like we wanted, and specially, when masturbation was not just and end of the day pain killer.
This seems like a middle aged man is writing his crisis for everyone to read, which would be true if I'm dated to meet death when I complete 40.
But I shouldn't be here just ranting about my social awkwardness problems, that wouldn't be fair to those who actually think this is lecture like economic blog.
So here it is for the world.
My country has an expiration date much more short than my own.
Germany think that everyone has already forgot about what happened with their third Reich, and want to re-gain the "most hateful country" title by refusing to help Greece.
USA… it's pointless to rant about them nothing that I say will even scratch the surface.
Asia is paradise for any business.
Africa wants' to be a colony of the highest bidder.
And the rest? They'll burn or up out this whole mess.
But hey we have to give a big round of applause, to the socialist policies that just keep on adding gasoline to this bun fire.
See you all
JSKofL
P.S.: some more words before I leave… facebook, twitter, myspace this would be pretty good ideas in a perfect world, but to me they just a frustration mechanism that leaves me sitting in infront the computer saying "What the Fuck" "fuck you" while I point my middle finger towards the non functional webcam
3 comments:
I've lost my faith in humanity long time ago
And I say I'm the one who's depressed...
I get you, I really do. I know exactly what you need right now, and no, it's not just some better way to take care of the masturbation problem (although that might help). No, I think what you need is a purpose. And purposes are damn rarer than diamonds in this world.
But guess what? No one can find one for you, it must be yourself doing it.
If you have so many things to remember, I say forget! Look through the windshield and not the rear-view mirror! If you don't like being in school then do something productive while you're there; think, imagine, dream. Make your own theories, search, and invent. If you want to meet someone, then the only way to become interesting is to become interested. This is the best advice I can give you!!! If you want company, we can go to the strip clubs, we can go to the bars, we could be wing mans, because I'm in the same boat! ;)
But ultimately, if you don't like your life, then fucking dare to change it! What better time then now, while it's day out there?
I guess it's time to fight your own lazy nature and go out there..
Why fight who you are? Because for social interaction we sometimes have to adapt ourselves,so the first talk don't get to be the last one.
And you'll see, when you cross that certain line, you'll get to be you 100%..
[i could go on but i'm already late to class; i may write a post about it]
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