Sunday, May 31, 2009
Secrets
Got a secret..Can you keep it?
One thing you get from aging is learn how not to care about secrets. Secrets are stupid and I'll explain why [yes,I'm in a good mood]
I do believe everyone is entitled to have personal stuff..things you feel you don't need to share with your friends or things you just don't want to.
However, everything changes when you tell people about that stuff you do not want them to know about. And there is when everything gets screwed up..The constant asking..the constant looking from others..the constant hope you'll let it slip and you're constant fear you might actually do it...
Tell you got a secret is the dumbest thing ever. That attitude shows that deep down you want to share that information, you just are too scared what impact it may cause on your beloved ones..
Let me tell you something..Telling stuff slowly have no less impact then just spit it out because the fact will be the same one way or the other.
And that is why, John, i am absolutely positive you should say something to anyone..anyone at all!!I understand you don't have the gut to tell her(or him- i would love you just the same way!) once society got developed in a way pretty much no one does.Telling someone how you feel is seen as something HUGE when is like saying "I love ice-scream" except "You are the ice-scream" [think how it would react.]
I would really like be extraordinary but i feel your pain dude.
As we grow up, we also learn people are not to be trusted..Well, that's kind of a problem..I'll give you that.
People talk and you often feel that sucks but the more you show you don't care, the less they'll speak. And there's have to do with immaturity as well.
So people talk..so what??Dogs bark!!
I am a "Truth fun" and therefore i believe secrets are like the process of coming out to tell your parents you are gay. It's like..I am not ready now..I'm studding the best way to do it..I gotta find a way to smooth it...BULL...You're gay and that is that!! And they only gets tortured by this questions because they has already made their made as they are doing it.
Anyway John....whatever you decide..telling...not telling..i ain't asking anymore....We're HERE!!!
(so the audience know..most people guess Giselle)
One secret at a time
Oscar Wilde
When one is in love, one always begins by deceiving oneself, and one always ends by deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.
Anonymous
It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
Whatever desire you have to discover what one feels, it is irresponsible. Everyone of us is unlike the other, everyone of us has diferent goals, noone sees through someone elses eyes. Where you see desire for knowladge one might see the consequences. Every thing has it's reaction, and not all are good. So please just quit bothering me...
Rorschach
Friday, May 29, 2009
The Bumblebee
Thursday, May 28, 2009
BREAKING
FOCUS, IS A KEY PART OF THE GAME
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
A Bee came to my ear and whispered "They think your judgments are unfair".
And you're right, my judgment is unfair. I know that naming someone after Lucifer; compare someone to an idiot dog, or just saying to go fuck and the only hint is a silly music, are not the right thing to do, or the fairest.
"Mais je ne suis pas désolé pour ce que j'ai fait", I truly think that my assessment of the many personalities that appear in this blog are more close to the truth than you might think. May I remember that a single human can never see his whole body; you can never see your own back. So you should just thank me for showing you your other side. And to make this clear I'm going to write on a full post characterizing all that are mentioned in previous posts, just to make clear any small typing that may be there.
Give yourself a clap;
John Scar Kramer
Sunday, May 24, 2009
The last Day on the pitch
Upload Music
(Before I start, let plea sorry to Jack and deWinter, but I only had one ticket)
The grass was green, the skies were blue has the 22 players entered the pitch. Courtesies were exchanged between the teams, before the whistle.
The match started with the ball circulating between the players, and before you knew it the ball was in the net, the stadium Raise all at the same time, thousands of hands up in the air in celebration.
The ruff tackles started flying, and referee wrote a symphony. The game started to get violent, and the players became sissies. The wossy-mania was on!!
A second goal came as surprisingly as the first, that calm down the crowd for the next 3 minutes, time it took for the opposition to cut one back, giving back to the game the redeem of the first 15 minutes. Without even noticing, half time was upon us. And the Cheer was just what the crowd needed, of came the cheer leaders, with the pompons in her hands dancing an incredible choreography to the sound of the music "girlfriend" by Avril Lavinge. The male audience gave a standing ovation for these spirit lifters, as they were leaving the field.
Of started the second half, and once again the ball was passed from feet to feet, head to head. At every tackle the crowd would go ecstatic, because either the referee was missing the foul play, or it really was something to remember.
Every minute the stadium echoed an "AHAAAaaaaa", or an "OWOWOooowoo", but the most common was the phrase "YOU Blind BASTARD!!!".
The last strategies of the season were plotted in both benches, one in search of the equalizing goal, the other looking for tranquility.
The subs were made; all under an enormous clapping concert has the players walked into the touch-line. The last minute was upon us, and everything seemed decided, but out of nowhere, the whistle blow, not for the signal the end of the match, but award a penalty… He placed the ball, he ran… he shouts… the kipper dives to the left… and the ball goes to the right, making the score 3-1 for the home team.
The final whistle was finally blown, signaling the end of the season for both teams.
And the tackles gave way to hand shacks and courtesies between the players, ending with all of them thanking the crowd, for their full support in the past 9 months.
It was a great day to play football indeed.
John Scar Kramer
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Meet Giselle
Giselle is the great stereotype of a Disney animation of a lady in distress, being tailed by a dragon, while waiting for little prince charming to slay, this fallow beast. (Good luck chump)
Giselle is a lovable character, responding with a shy smile to our evil laughs, and jack's queer whatever. In her naiveté's, it's easy to spot some ignorance, and too much trust. Having just arrived to our little Olympus, Giselle is our greatest way to check the public reaction to every little thunder we decide to strike upon the earth.
She brought more restraining to the group, making our talks more light. Now we have gentle smiles instead of evil laughs, we talk about problems instead of just plotting the next move.
Having all this qualities, I'm bound to acknowledge that it's all going to change. Because deWinter will just ruin it for everyone and offer her a poisoned apple.
Welcoming you, in name of the team:
John Scar Kramer
P.S.: After so many asked I'm going to pull a first and translate everything, exactly, into Portuguese. So here goes…
Conhecendo Gisela.
A Gisela é um grande estereótipo de uma donzela em apuros das animações da DreamWorks, tendo um dragão sempre a trás, pelo menos até vir um orc que seja contratado pelo príncipe encantado para a vir salvar. (Boa sorte Trambolho)
A Gisela é uma criatura adorável, que reponde sempre com um sorriso tímido a toda a gargalhada malévola, ou a qualquer coisa bué porreira que o John esteja a fazer. Na sua tolice é fácil de encontrar uma crescente luta contra o desconhecido, e demasiada confiança em terceiros. A sua recente chegada ao monte Olimpo, faz com que ela seja o caminho mais curto para percebemos como reage a generalidade populacional aos nossos trovões.
Ela trouxe rédeas ao grupo, fazendo com que as nossas conversas não sejam tanto a brincar e mais sérias e objectivas. Falamos agora de moda e médias, ao passo que no passado, brincávamos e riamo-nos das pequenas crianças com que co-habitamos no nosso dia-a-dia.
Tendo tantos defeitos esta personagem, creio que só vamos conseguir mudar isto quando a Lady DeWinter oferecer uma maçã não lá muito saudável à Gisela.
Dando as boas vindas ao grupo, em nome de toda a equipa.
Rorschach
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Fonzie - Shout it out
Shout it out I say
I've given up what I thought I knew
Shout it out I say
Now I have a voice and a point of view
I love this 30 seconds... the rest of the song is ok...
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Oligocracy
Jack's latest post links you to a video in which the first part is about the scheming that religion is and a second part about the power of rich and resourceful minority over the world.
If you saw the movie, you're probably surprised, and asking yourself "How can this be?"
I don't know how it all started, but my high school economics teachers told me that what we're so shocked to hear about started when the human first started to live in society.
I haven't study history in the last 5 years, but I think that the only time in human history that there was true democracy was during the first years as a society, before Egyptians, Greeks or Romans; there was a time when the human being life as part of a herd, and anyone could challenge the leader.
Since then the ratio of People in charge/ total population has just being decreasing. In ancient Rome, there was a senate; later during the dark ages the Vatican had sovereignty over every European kingdom; but then came Martin Luther and the over the world was under the protestant countries, being this the longest period of time without a shift, happening only after the first world war; after which all changed, having two Anglo-Saxons (USA and Great Britain) and Russia; But after world war two Britain got cut out of the picture, leaving the other two to divide the world into tow for the second time in history. But after the fall of the U. R.S.S. we were left only with the United States of America as a ruler.
Now if I could take a moment I would like to explain how an infant adult like me sees the society we live.
My point of view is that we don't live in democracy, but rather in a system known in economy has oligopoly (?) an oligopoly is a market form in which a market or industry is dominated by a small number of sellers (oligopolists), but to make it more correct I'll give it a new name Oligocracy (mostly the same but under a different name). So oligocracy is a regime in which a small group of people rules the country.
You may argue that there are elections every 4-5 years to prevent that.
And you'll be absolutely right, by saying that. But this oligocracy is rules over any countries president. This oligopoly is controlled by banks, oil refineries, warlords… And every country is in dept to them. And this dept is so big that if the government does not fulfill with their demands they risk a total shut down, and actually bringing to life the metaphor shit hole we say we live in.
Now that I explained my way of seeing things, I know you're probably traumatized, greatly traumatized if you actually saw the movie till the end. But I have some words to ease you now:
If there's something that history taught us was that nothing lasts forever, so this system will crumble eventually.And when it does it's going to be either because of greed, competition or both.
John Scar Kramer
Monday, May 18, 2009
Some things happened and made me change my mind.
So here it is... Religion as I see it:
My mother is an atheist. Growing up with her, made us much alike in many points. I've grown up an atheist as well.
Lately I've realized I might be wrong. I believe in science, and I don't believe in extremes, undoubtable truths nor dogmas (kinda redundant, I know...).
So I think I should define myself as agnostic instead.
I have no faith in no God. If the future shows me it exists, good... if not, I will assume it doesn't for the sake of reason. But I don't discriminate religious people, I think faith it's a natural refuge for the human mind. To think that there is something greater, wiser and stronger, taking care of us, makes us feel safe.
What I don't like is when talking about religion becomes a tabu. Who has the right to tell you you can't joke and mock it, because you might question someone's faith? I think no one.
This past weekend in our home town, there was a religious celebration. A monument of Jesus Christ has been built 50 years ago, and the image of a saint came all the way from the north of the country to... wish him a happy birthday.
It was outrageous! 200 000 euros spent, the subway closed, caos in the traffic, the public tv station making live reports all afternoon. And guess who is paying for this little christian celebration? Yeah, you got it...
This is wrong. We live in a secular society so things like these are not supposed to happen! But no one seems to care much...
I don't wanna atack any religion in particular, but Christianity is the one I deal with every day so I can't help it. I just wonder if half of these believers know any thing about it. Like really knowing, not just believing in every word that's in the Bible, just because it's there. How can someone think the true words of Jesus are written there after 2000 years of translations, censures and so long?
If you're willing to learn you can see this (it's maybe the most interesting two hours I've ever spent watching something). If you're not, don't bother...
Richard Dawkins is one of the most famous atheists in the world. So if you're thinking about asking me this, just watch:
I thought I could say everything I was willing to in this little big post, but there's so much I don't agree with, som many things wrong, it just takes a while longer to say it. So be prepared for more on this subject, 'cause now I believe I have all the right to say what I want about it, fearlessly...
Sunday, May 17, 2009
May not be a Tomorrow
We spend our whole life worrying about the future.Planing for the future. Trying to predict the future. As if fingering it out would make any difference. But the future is always changing. The future is the home of our biggest fears and our wildest hopes..But one this is certain, when it finally reveals itself the future is never the way we imagine it.
Again, many people spend many time focusing on the future. But at some point you start to realize your life is happening now.Not after college, not after thirty, right now!!..This is it, it is always happening. Blink and you'll miss it.
I guess that is why i go to this parties. Being there, talking to people I've never seen, getting drunk and stupid gives me the brief idea I'm not actually missing my own life. Makes me feel alive. And is the same reason that makes me see this as something sporadic and not weekly or even monthly.
I know the way i see thinks is totally stupid and pointless. But is my way.
I've said before i make an afford to avoid plans. Plans for tomorrow, plans for next week, plans for my life. I wish i was a "live-in-the-moment" kind of girl. I'm not. But still, a girl can dream, even knowing that's all it is, a dream. And if i can get temporarily closer to that dream, why not?
The way i see it, we should be direct and honest [certain situations only when you're actually asked to] because people can try to be better while they are alive..Spilling it out when they're gone is not respect for the dead, is only personal progress. The thing is wouldn't you've wanted to know you did help to change someone's life?Make a difference. We need each other in order to move forward...
So did you say it?
I love you...i don't want to live without you..Marry me..
I cannot stand being with you..i'm sorry..i miss you..
Are you going to? You should..Cause this is it. You're life is now and it might all be gone tomorrow.
The drunken ticket
Yesterday our little group took a wild ride to the Technical University of Lisbon party.
Skipping the discretional introduction, it was just like any other Young adult parties, with lots of alcohol and shouts. I state once again that these things aren't my ideal Friday night arrangement, neither are they ever a backup plan. As friendship seems to mean sacrifice, I took one for the team.
(I would just like add apart from the post I intend to write, that our little three person group, although it hasn't grown in authors it has grown in friends, for It starts to become regular the junction of a new member that later will be given a nickname, where there were three are now four)
We went there basically to meet some long lost-of-sight colleagues, giving them the same old don't give a crap dialog, and I must confess I was a little curious about one of the performances. Moving on… There we were meeting some of Jack's and deWinter's friends, having to talk to some tang-out dog, who just don't shut up with his stupid no good for nothing stories, and being a fancy beer coup holder.
Thirty minutes there and I thought hell had frozen, because I was having the feeling that I was in hell, and it was freezing. Making it ideal for more drinks to be served and poured down the young audience mouths. Forty minutes and I lost count of the number of people standing by de edge waiting for their dinner to find its way back out, and the night was only starting.
Then I just lost track of time and went in a search for something to eat, striping myself a part of the group, for a while. And for that while I thought to myself, how these people can call this fun, I was seeing people going up and down none of them seemed to be happy, just hopeful, for whatever it was in their mind to fade into the night. But then I realized what's fun for me is totally different for them, so for one hole night I'll give them space to enjoy themselves, having little to worry.
And back I headed to the group, and there they were all together in a circle, shouting impossible to hear sounds, and laughing of the little they could interpret. Some turned and asked me if I was alright, I gave a negative answer, explaining strait away that it wasn't nothing physical, but more in the psychology branch. Their stupefied faces became confused ones, so I quit my attempt to make myself look smart and just said the magic words "Just kidding".
The time for the main event came and my expectations were high… until it started, I don't know if it was my mood or the acoustic, but the show didn't feel right. The group dispersed into pairs departing into all directions. Leaving me and Jack alone, in the middle of the crowd. We steeled there for a little while, and discussed how something was right; the show didn't fill anything like it. We tried for some time to find what the problem was, but eventually we quitted and went up to the hot dog kiosk for a real treat, and to sit down for a while. We talked about what were we witnessing, and how could people enjoyed themselves in this situation, tearing my give them space idea apart. It was a depressing sight, people in the corners making a lot of noise, and drinking beer, soloing shots of alcohol, people on the side bending down grabbing their stomach, cursing the last drink they had and praying for all to come out nice and easy, while the people on the center just stood there in their little groups, with one coupe of cursed liquid on one hand and a cigarette on the other, shouting drunk speeches, and walking zigue-zague.
After a long time observing and a well behaved discussion we clarified that neither of us is going to ever enjoy this little social tradition.
The concert approached its end, and we decided to go in search of deWinter and our just joined to the group friend, having a little approach of our own along the way, where a drunk girl zigue-zaguing through empty space complemented me in my rugby French jersey, which I politely thanked, promptly following through to our goal to restore the group. (Please don't make a big deal out of it)
The Restoring of the groups, square culminated with the end of the main event. Finally giving a pause for the girls to have a bite to eat, and up we went again. Accompanying the girls to their hunger satisfaction, like the fine gents we are. Once more we steeled on the stairs and had a chat about everything there is to chat about. Even about love and hatred towards friends and colleagues. Until we decided to finish it all off and call it a night.
This night was of little importance to our future, and it will not be marked with any significant detailed, other than this: Friendship means sacrifice, and our group is proud to make it anytime that is needed, we aren't good friends, we are just true friends. And that will stand for more than any night.
John Scar Kramer
P.S.: In the eventuality you're still thinking about the jerseys compliment, don't worry it's nothing that I hadn't heard before. And I'm no longer searching. Even if my friends don't get it.
Friday, May 15, 2009
The Diamond
Now I get it! Now that a new light has shined upon my eyes, I get it. The need, the warm feeling and the chilling, the strange lack of words when she's around, now I get it all. I'm not a poet, but now I feel the need to write our song. And there enough floors that I could by to truly match her beauty. In the wind, I imagine her body floating, like a sail, with me giving the music of my heart pounding all the way.
I meet someone new, someone who brighten by eyes and showed me the pleasure in silence, and the joy of happy words. I wisped lies to deaf ears, but now my friends, I'm here shouting to you and the world. The love of my life lives… You're skeptical, you think it is a joke, like the one time pulls me every few moments I see her, it seems it stops, and leaving just us in a dead space, but then it comes again leaving every word I wanted to declare to her in the end of my mouth without ever leaving it. Because with love comes also the feeling of self-dough. Can I give her what she needs, can I break the ice? Does she feel the same? Or am I just looking to a mirror that tricks me by changing right and wrong, a smile for a cry, a hello for a goodbye, and a hug for a stab?
But these empty words of feelings if not felt back will crash under depression. But how do I know, I She's my Juliet and I'm her Romeo? How do I know?
This is why I now turn to you, for all the help I can get is less than I must need, for the naivety is something that I don't really understand, may you ask jack if you like, and my naïve heart little knows about love, and how to share it with others.
Help me catch my brut diamond. Please
Rorschach
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
(started as) Quiet Friends, (ended as) Not Quite Friends
I cannot deny i was kind of nervous with the whole situation i mean, there was a lot of social pressure.I had to like the girl and she had to like me back. Why? Let's just say last time Jack's lover turned out to hate me which made him and me feel unconfortable quite a few times and i have to make sure it does not become a sequel.
The moment he opened that door, they were nothing as expected!!...(and that can totally be a good thing)...Now, was she nice?? Yes... Could we be friends?? Yes... So, do i think Jackipa make a great couple??NO!!
My job as a friend is not sabotage Jack's love life, it is to tell him how i see things when he asks me..i do like her but he can do much better...or, if it makes You Jack feel any better, let's just say she is not Jack's girlfriend material...[but with this recycling thing you never know...]
BTW, she is a six in a scale from one to ten...Yeah!
Reediting Quiet Friends
You see Jack tried to broaden our little social circle, introducing two much unknown female friends, joining the two parts for dinner.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Quiet Friends
What I learned, which I actually already knew, is that silence is a very important matter in friendships. The good ones can afford to have it, the bad ones cannot.
- those who talk about everything, everywhere and everytime. With these ones you never get tired of sharing stuff, you can just talk and talk and keep talking like forever, because you have always something to say.
- those who talk about everything, everywhere... With these ones you can have moments when you don't have to talk and you feel confortable anyway. It doesn't mean you have nothing to say, it just means you have nothing to say right now, and you're sure you'll have time to say it, 'cause they aren't going anywhere.
Not being a very chatty person sometimes, I prefer those friendships where I don't feel the pressure of silence, and so, that's what I aim at, when I meet someone I like. Sometimes you get it, sometimes you don't.
I guess if there's a test by which you can "rate" your friendships, it's seeing how confortable you feel being in silence within them.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
1 2 3 4
It's not so much about the music, nor the video (it kinda sucks), but I really liked this part because it's so geniously written:
Theres only one thing
Two Do
Three words
Four you
I love you
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Empty hopes and last dreams in some binary code
I can't write morality speeches, because my morals and ideals were long ago burned, leaving me in a grey space. Not knowing what to do next.
I have no goal, no wishes, and no ambition. Basically I'm an empty body circulating around you. I'm losing appetite for life, almost like everything is tasteless food. I have neither hunger nor strength.
It's this absence of strength, keeps me from cutting my string and having a face to face meeting with Hades.
I learned that there are two kinds of good men in this world; the ones who dream about flying but keep their feet on the ground, and those who put bumps on seats.
Has for me I'm living in the underground, and the show that is my life has put the every seat in epilepsy choc.
Every day I wait for better dreams, and as they don't come, I wish time could run faster, and I wonder, if my wish came true, would I ever regret wishing it or will it jump right to the end, leaving no place for regrets.
A Young Gentleman should not write such words, because he has still a great path ahead – Then again, maybe that's why my team mates called me "The old man", giving them the possibility to joke, every time I miss a social event, about the possibility of maybe perhaps of me losing my breath, for one last time…
Death reminds me of immortality. Immortality in the sense that I would be remember long after I pasted away. I used to think I would go immortal, to be remembered like Guy Fawkes, Achilles and Beethoven. But after having forgotten what I would stand for… There's nothing to be remembered about, except the eventual entry in this little unknown and abandon blog.
Posts about economy (or so I say), physics, social relations, games, movies, chronicles about our time, past and future. A hell bunch of words, that at the end of the day are just o's and ones strangely organized.
Empty hopes and last dreams in some binary code. Where would you put your last hopes on?
John Scar Kramer and Rorschach
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Sunday, May 3, 2009
I have climbed highest mountain
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you
I have run
I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you
But I still havent found what Im looking for
But I still havent found what Im looking for
I don't know, I just feel like that right now. I still haven't found it, that thing... And I'm not talking about someone... well, not only... I still don't know what I wanna do in the future, where I wanna go and stuff like that. I guess we all feel like that sometimes. But I'm stubbern enough not to doubt my choices. I know why I made them and I'm still sure about them. I'm just lacking someone to share interests with. That has always been my problem and it won't go away that easily. I thought, with college and all, I would find a greater number of people I could talk to, but even though I have good friends there, they're not that into it...
But my birthday is coming... And I may get a new suit! :P so I guess I'm excited! I mean, who can have philosophical depressing retorical questions to ask, when he has a new suit????
This is why i think he's Awesome!!!
By now, you're probably wondering who the hell is this guy!! ..He is someone i really admire and do not know at all.
David is studing politics. Back at highschool he was kind of popular but that was not why i noticed him...it was when he shared with everyone his speech about the state of education in both Portugal and our school..
That moment was crucial to me.. he touch my soul by making me realise how important politics are and how important we all are in that scenario...he made me feel like i could make a difference!!
At the moment i'm not politicly active..i mean, i could be way more than i am. But, if i ever get there, i would like to do it with the passion this guy does...
He is gorgeous? Yeah...but i do not think it is his best attribute..To me he is a great politician (or maybe even a leader) to be. Keep going!!
The really great thing about yesterday is i found this video in which he talks to every citizen in Portugal. And thanks to tecnology i do have the opportunity tho share it with you guys. The bad thing is non-portuguese speakers will not understand a single word he says...Life is a bitch!!
Ladies and Gentleman, watch and Learn!!
Advertisin diversaty
It's in Portuguese, so for the few of you those understands or are pacient enough to get the author totranslate it, read this:
http://cogumelo-pensante.blogspot.com/2009/05/join-us.html
Have a good one,
John Scar Kramer
Friday, May 1, 2009
Jack aka Mr.Manhattan
Here i present you Jack, the most peacefull (alive) guy on Earth...