Late night

It's four in the morning, but the Sun is nowhere to be found. I find that funny. It must be the lack of sleep, sorely.

I'm not tired just deprived of sleep, which are two different things, you know that…

Or so I should think… I do have this strange feeling that the only people that read the stupidificating posts I write, do so because only they can surpass my public idiocracy. And so I always feel like I need to explain every single thing, to put everyone into context so to say… Like dreams and thoughts could be explained, well they can, but they never sound the same.

And you have to add the judgment you're automatic victim of for saying out loud the way you truly feel and think. So snobbish, so retarded, so irrational, without sense, beautiful, life changing… it's all very funny, but you're ruining it for me… I don't want to change anyone… not true; actually I want to change everyone. But it's so hard. People think and feel differently, which would be awesome If we were building a colorful rainbow. But we aren't we're building a world, a new one, a better one; can we decide upon a single ideology and go with it… the world would be so much better that way.

Freedom is overrated anyway; only martyrs are truly free, everyone else is just… advertised to be free. "Hey! My dear sir! Would like to have some freedom of speech, where you could say anything that came to your stupid idea filled head? You do? Oh! My dear sir! Have I just got the thing for you. BLogSter, a piece of internet damaged *technical terms* that you can use to close yourself in your room and type things no one cares about but every single people can track you. But you want more? Want to show it to your friends? Then why not add Hi5, facebook, myspace and/or twitter acconts, so that you can show every other house domesticated friend of yours what crappy work have you been doing. Did I just Say "work"? Oh sorry! I meant shittty shitty shitty shitty paper of yours. And if you're not happy ( or suicidal) Why not buy an iphone, ipad or Ishitty so that you don't have to use a blister farm that is your keyboard? Oh! And there's also this new featured that has just come out that's called wave, which is said to revolutionize that ancient email thing that you use to communicate! With wave you don't have to worry about incriminating evidence because you can just erase it all in the end. And voila! A new thief, rapest or killer is born! But because you don't go out that's not something we worry about."

I found in myself such amusement because even dough I know all the dirt I still buy them all these crap. I tell myself it's so that I don't become a so great sociopath as I think of myself to be. But then I stay in my home for whole days checking the empty souls behind all the photos and words in the net.

I'm just as empty as the rest and a little bit more suicidal and unstable. And that's why I can't wait for my pension years.

And that's why it's hard to publish thoughts they aren't real, nor are they unreal. they just are something and nothing.

John Scar Kramer of Lioncourt