Disco vs. Fun

In less than a week, I saw what I've been missing and what I miss.

Both have the same name, yet great is the difference between them. I'm talking about parties.

This weekend I got the chance to peek what my generation enjoy their selves in this celebrations, that's what I've been missing. And two days after, in the first day of the workweek, I was how I used to celebrate every good thing that happened to me at my ten years of age, that's what I miss.

It's hard sometime to look back… Because we sometimes lose our selves reminiscing, seeing all the good, but forgetting the bad. Although this case is like so, age gave me responsibility that I did not want, and perks I do not wish, and speeches I'm tiered to hear. I've been missing what people say to be the best years of my life, not because I'm a workaholic, far from that. I just don't want to get drunk, smoke weed and wake up every day with a freaking headache, and call that the best party of my life. No! I like my routes more than my leafs, my perfect party would be an afternoon playing whatever game me and my friends want to enjoy, then race karts, ending the day with dinner and a great movie.

Now this isn't a common request among those of my age, and they say that I'm at the age of trying new things, and that I should open myself to change.

Well unfortunately for me change always comes. But I think that even then I'll prefer my ten year-old party to my twentieth.

John Scar Kramer

Hard work, even before you get it!

As we were heading to this unbelievably great party we ended up not going, I came across this phylosophical question of much importance:

Does conquering the girl/boy of your dreams demand a constant struggle?

I wanna focus on the "conquering" part, as I know that keeping an already grown relationship healthy and alive is an everyday work. And it should be. I don't believe in soulmates and destined lovers, so I think it will never work if you don't care enough to make every day a little different, a little better.

Anyway, the conquering part... and by this I mean that time before you assume a relationship. It can take hours for some people, as it can take years for others.
It's the second best part of "it". This is the time where you fall in love, where you're nervous everytime that person walks into the room. Is the time where you say and do the most stupid things.
Now, can enough time, work and stuborness get you the girl/boy?
Maybe yes, eventually... But what a waste! It's only in the movies that the all-time neighbours end up falling in love, as he saves her from the alliens or something. And in my opinion, that's not fair to the one who had all the work.

"Oh, I realize now that I love you!!"
"Great! But as I was coming near to jump from the bridge because I thought you'd never love me, you didn't even look at me!!! Nevermind, let's be happy ever after!"

This is what I thought 3 days ago. I realized since then, that there's a catch! The only thing I need to get the girl of my dreams is to be myself and wait for her to come. I think so...
There will eventually come a girl that likes me just the way I am - or at least most of the things I am - and I will make her the girl of my dreams (the dreams are efemerous things).
Now the catch: being JUST yourself is one of the most difficult tasks you'll ever do. Not being nicer, nor funnier, nor more sensitive, nor cockier. That's hard and demands work.
So, in conclusion, I realize now that it takes a constant struggle to get someone to like you. A struggle to be just the way you are, so that your ideal match can come and see it.
After you get into a relationship, then you can be as many things as you want and if she(he)'s one of the possible "ones", she(he)'ll understand.


Sorry for how long this got :P

I am not it …

I'm a fucking bigot, I'm tall, I'm fat, a lazy man, stupid guy, and the worst writer you read today, the worst friend a person can have. I'm a smartass, I'm greedy, distracted, I'm the Don't-give-a-crap-man, I'm a comic fanatic, I'm a liar, I'm a clamp, I'm a referee, I'm corrupt, I'm a failure, I'm a joke, I'm a cinema fan, I'm a coach, I judge, and do stupid things that I come to regret. But I'm not a voyeur. And it pisses me off when someone calls me such a thing.

Now that I got it all out of my system. Here is to you

HERES TO YOU from the film "Sacco e Vanzetti" - Lisbeth Scott, written by Ennio Morricone

Warning

There comes a time in everyone's life where we feel like this:




But the key to good driving is preparation and trainning:

After weeks of struggle I finally got my drivers license!! And it was easy as hell, much more than I thought.

But I'm not writing this post for you to congratulate me - most of you already did; thank you. I am writing this post because I want to warn you of something.
Remember that post where I put to the vote some possibilities for my car?
Well... if everything goes according to plan... it'll be neither of those.
And my warning is:

"This is how you will be when you see it:"

The solution to my problem is B&B

For the past year I started thinking and talking, to Jack and deWinter, on the possibility of me having a girlfriend (We also talk about Jack's future (whatever gender)friend, and the lady's (something with a wood)friend).

In the hopping that my predicament is solved before hell freezes over, I've been observing couples, studying them. And after 12 months, I came up with a hypothesis, untested still.

The hypothesis goes like so: there are only three kinds of couples (male-female obviously) in my generation, the High school sweethearts (HSS), the Jugglers (J) and The beauties and the Beasts (B&B).

The HSS's, are the ones that meet in the first day of school, fall for one and other, and the rest is just like soup operas, with all their humps and dumps. (Remember the OC, is just like that, if you don't remember, well it's Grey's Anatomy without all the promiscuity).

The J's, well they aren't exactly couples, they're more like a group that never really settle, having a new partner every other day (they are Grey's Anatomy just the way you see it). Compromise isn't a word in their dictionary.

Finally we're left with the B&B, which are the ones that people talk about when they say "how can a gall so beautiful be with such a jerk?" .

Now if my theory does prove to be right, my only chance of ever date, is to be part of the B&B, and I'm not talking about the beauty part (but I promise I have plenty of it).

This means, my way out of this situation of mine is by being even more of a prick that I've been so far. So in the next time I come to meet a girl that I kinda don't know if I like I just have be a total jerk and it will be all ok, that can't be too hard, can it? J

John Scar Kramer

If it weren’t a video-game it would be the best movie of the decade

My friends you are witnessing a rare moment in my lifetime, for I'm now willing to bow for someone else than my reflection. Hideo Kojima is that that I bow to. Why? Because this man has been able to create the most perfect thing I've ever seen, the Metal Gear Solid series.

I've been a fan of this espionage, infiltration kind of game, from a very early age, although I never played the first episode of the series, I've watched patiently my cousins doing their best to complete the game, at the time played in the first Sony console Play station, also known as PSX or just PS.

After following the first battle between Solid Snake against his brother Liquid, we were all astonished, giving total support to the election of the best game of the century, it was in the year 1999, I think.

We had to wait 4 years and for PS2 to once again take part in a Hideo Kojima artistically mastered video-game. Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty, in which we take action with a new character named Raiden, joining shortly forces with the old Snake. This one was a great improvement in graphics making it an exceptional game as well, although at that time I felt that the story was short and less satisfying than the first one.

Three years pasted and we're then awarded with a prequel of the first one, were the gamer takes control of the Big Boss, father of the hero solid Snake, during a cold war crisis. Great game full of the experienced one had similar in the first.

But nothing was ever so good as what was to come…

The Forth and last episode of the Metal Gear Solid Saga. Guns of Patriots . This game is mind twistingly fantastic, making it for me the best game I've ever played.( I don't want to be a spoiler so I'll just say this) Solid Snake: I'm no hero... Never was. I'm just an old killer... Hired to do some wet work.

If you get a chance don't miss it, and enjoy it because the first time is the best.

P.S.: Please comment

Nerdy talk

aka my dream future :P

Hands down [down, down...way down]

My first video here is going to be a Dashboard Confessional song, Hands down.
I love this lyrics..it's just so well thought.....it really makes you wanna sream at "that special person", come on dude!!Let's go nuts and DO IT...

[i could have put the official clip but on this video the guy is wearing a suit so it wins right there]

Hotel California

John introduced me and Jack to the world's most fun game ever!!
No you perverts, it isn't any sexual thing!!....Guitar hero itself.




It's amazing how a little very expensive box as PS (1, 2 ou 3) can amuze you for such a long time..
Jack was as happy as Pickachu..John as concentrate as Neo and i was watching as a voyeur...
Now boys...Men isn't a real men if he doesn't like this game...
You have it?
(...this could be haven or this could be hell...)

Their bound to steal it away

Get Out Alive - Three Days Grace

Don't put your life in someone's hands
Their bound to steal it away


The music is great, but the only thing i want to focus on is the two verses i transcriped from the lyrics.
Can you really trust someone in this world?
If you think of it properly... you see you don't even trust yourself. Proof? Easy to find actually. Just remember the last time you did not bought that chocolate, because you could not stop yourself of eating it all at once. Or the time you said it would be the last.

Trust is a hard thing to come by, more in our days dan in the past. But i trust in people, so do you, because if not we would just go insane, with all the screts we keep, the thing is that i don't trust them with the key. It may sound like some rubish Harry putters thing but it is true. I give almost every peace of information that i have to my trusties, leaving only some key element behind.
Jack and deWinter don't acktually have any idea of wich are my screts, but they know some of the screts i keep from others.

And to show I appreciation I'll tell you one: "there's something I'm not keeping for mutch longer"

Title

"If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character... Would you slow down? Or speed up?"

I really like this quote, because, even after thinking about it, I don't know what I would do... I'm not gonna talk about life after death - that deserves a larger reflection - but assuming this isn't IT, this isn't our last and only chance in this world, should we portrait our little characters deeply and with meaning or should we fly through them so we could live a lot of different things in different ways?
Should we live many good stories, or few great ones?

A friend in need is a friend indeed....

Pure morning - Placebo

Truth be told friends are some bullshit guys (no bad intended) you invite to pass the evening with you, and beg for money, every other time. No one likes to hear that, so we has friends of each other’s normally don't say it or write it like I did.
To be friend is somehow odd to me. Because I don't trust anyone (The reason I don't trust anyone, is because it's easier to tackle someone then to help him up)
, at least entirely. And the closes to me know that. And although we say friends are the ones who respect you for who you are. They still go around my back trying to know what secrets I secretly keep. (Not that I mind)
Telling the truth doesn't really matter in the general idea, it depends, from case to case. I can't blame my friends for lying to me, I do the same.
And something about truth: In the end, truth it's what stays in history, that has we all know is told by the winners.

Rorschach

Truth or Dare?

Last week Jack and I found ourselves discussing whether friends should tell the truth, no matter how much it might hurt the other person or if friends should be only concerned with the other person well being. Back then i was soure of my position: truth always, but now i can see what Jack meant.

Friends give friends a number of things : advices, full attention,truth...!!
TRUTH is hard, the truth is awkward and very often the truth hurts. I mean, people say they want the truth but do they really? Truth is sometimes they don 't.
Deep down, nobody wants to hear it. Sometimes we tell the truth because the truth is all we have to give. Sometimes we tell the truth because we need to say it out loud so we can hear it from ourselves. Sometimes we tell the truth because we can’t just help ourselves.
But what really pisses me off is I know Sometimes truth isn’t good enough, sometimes people deserve more...
And so i have to think we tell them the truth because we owe them, at least that much.

Jack, i'm sorry i waited that long to tell you the truth and i'm glad you were able to forgive me. But that situation made me realise a lot of things i was blindly ignoring. Thank you!

Final part of lent. (The Passion)

Last time, I left the message of forgiveness and pardon. Now I come up for the last time, with:

The Passion

God descended to earth, through his Son. Who thought us a new way of living, and who this God, who witch we prayed to but never actually seen was.
The Son talked about the Father, The Father showed himself, some of us believed, some didn’t (some do others don’t, life’s just that way).
But we we’re still babied in Sin. And so the Father, noticing it, asked the Son to save us. The Son accepted.
It wasn’t a pleasant burden to carry, this that the son took; it was painful, almost unbearable. Flesh was ripped of his back, blood dripping from head to toe, caring the weight of the lumber on your back while you climb the mountain to your death. Everyone is there but no one helps. The Son falls for the first time, the guards kicked Him to get up. He falls a second time, and some one of the crowed was chosen to help Him carry the burden of all men’s sins up the mountain. There, the cross is grounded and The Son over it is laid. The left hand is grabbed by one of the guards, over the left wood of the cross, metal meets flesh, and shortly after they touch the nail is hammered, once, then twice, three painful times. Then the right hand it’s placed over the right wood, and once again three painful hammerers. Then the feet are grabbed by the guards, and in each it is putted a nail. (It is said that many would go mad with the pain caused by the nailing).
The Son is then elevated, and starts to asphyxiate, and every breath he takes, is a torturous attempt, until he delivers the final sigh.
Many were prior and after condemned the same way, but the Son has the particular, that e was condemned for being “JESUS OF NAZARETH THE KING OF THE JEWS”. It’s notable that someone was willing to go through and did go through such a painful death to ride mankind of all Sins. This is the true Passion

Judah Ben-Hur: Almost at the moment He died, I heard Him say, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."
Esther: Even then.
Judah Ben-Hur: Even then. And I felt His voice take the sword out of my hand.

John scar Kramer

P.S.: Have a good Easter

Andy McKee

I wish I could do that :(

Big Adventure

Yesterday we took the chance
We went on a journey in seas never before sailed.
We knew the risks and dangers
But, in the end, we came back!

That's right, John drove me and Milady in his new car. I was held the duty to describe this journey. I'll do it in three parts:

The Past - in the past, our preferable (and only) way to get to a place was by public transportation. That means hours of waiting around, changing subway lines, stairs up and down and traveling alone most of the time.

The Present - with John's newly aquired drivers license, we feel free to go have dinner anywhere we want, stop anywhere and just be there listening to the radio, talking about anything. We are together in the getting there, in the being there and in the leaving. Until we get sick of each other, that's cool!
Of course it's not all a bed of roses. I need, urgently, to get used to those hi-speed turns! Not bad turns, just sport-driving-kinda-like turns...
In conclusion, it gets us from point A to point B, faster, more confortable and it's a lot of fun. I must say, I wouldn't do better.

The Future - in the future I see ourselves in big road trips and "rallying" inside every city we go through, with 150km/h turns, big police chases and a hell of a party inside the little ford... Let's wait and see.


Congratulations John, for the maturity shown in overcoming such a difficult task.

Keep you in the dark,
you know they all pretend

Big Numbers

I started my holidays today... And so I had nothing to do all night...
I thought: "why not learn something?"

So, I made this for all of you:
Big Numbers (go down there and click where it says "Save file to you PC")

Only read it if you're in a patient mood, I recon it can be boring :/
Hope you like it

Beeing away...

I've been away for some time (not that you fellows have noticed), taking my time to think, study bew ways of thinking and acting.
My getaway, has tought me that Lisbon is a trash can.
I've came away from that dark air, straight town, to travel into a clear aired, full of ups and downs land. To find clear streets, happy people, people that have a problem of no stress at all. I'm almost in love with this lost land, now found. If you live in This Nation you must not pass your life without going to the north, east, south, oest. If you have a chance DO NOT MISS THE OUTSIDE.

Just so YOU know...

I just want to tell you to comment this blog. It may not be the best one but is worthy of some comment activity.
Besides, we would really enjoy to be proved wrong.

It's bloody easy!

lol

And she will...

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along, yeah
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

[in the background]
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

Yeah
[softly]
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Try so hard to say goodbye

Hard Life

I don’t know much about human psychology (I don’t even know if this is redundant) but I know one thing: people tend to victimize themselves too much.

Either it’s lack of money, too much money, lack of happiness, lack of intelligence, feeling ugly, etc, etc, everyone always finds at least one answer to the question “why is your life so hard?”. And I don’t like that at all.

I once had a teacher who, almost every morning class, as early as 8am, would say “You think your life is hard? You’re wrong: you’re lucky. You have food and water on your table, you are healthy and you are here, learning. You’re luckier than most.” That’s the only thing I remember from that teacher.
And so, I think that’s the key to surpass all your problems: relativity.

I don’t like when I hear people saying their life is hard, they have all sorts of misfortunes happening to them all the time, they’re not happy, they make up problems even when they don’t have them…

From my point of view, life is so easy… I just live it… and that’s it. I learn with the past, “I live in the moment”, but I always think about the future. There’s nothing hard in that. But if you don’t learn with your mistakes, it’s ok. If you don’t do or say everything you wanted to, it’s ok. If you worry too much about the future, or if you don’t worry at all, it will be ok…
You have no tests, like in school; you have no pressure, because you already know how it’s going to end.

What would you say to someone who’s about to be born?

I would say: Come with no fear. Live. Dream. Love. But anger not to do that. Be patient. Be kind. Be good. Expect to get what you give, but always hope for more. And give more.

To live life, you just have to be alive. It’s easy. Everyone does it!

“Just remember, the same as a spectacular Vogue magazine, remember that no matter how close you follow the jumps: Continued on page whatever. No matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed feeling under your skin that you didn't experience it all. There's that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should've been paying attention. Well, get used to that feeling. That's how your whole life will feel some day. This is all practice. None of this matter. We're just warming up.”
Chuck Palahniuk

Sing it again...

credit: http://leloveimage.blogspot.com/

Screw It!

I’m the kind of people who usually had a plan..In fact, I had one which should have guide me trough my life...Pathetic? Yeah..Pretty much.

Plans…oh plans…Even with the best plans, complications can rise upon, things can go wrong and suddenly you get LOST, you are left not to know what to do.
The problem with plans is they don’t take into count the unexpected, so when it steps into the picture, we need to improvise. Of course some of us are better at it than others. Some of us just have to move on to plan B and make the best of it.
Sometimes what we want is exactly what we need but sometimes what we need isn’t the plan.
My plan got killed to sunshine and I had to react which by i mean: don’t make plans when you can’t follow through.( and most of the times you can’t!)

JSK/R Reader's choice exercise

Dreamer, I aint nothing but a dreamer.
At school I'm dreaming, at home i'm dreaming, in the field they say I'm dreaming. But even having so much time to dream never have I dreamt about you.

Now this can either go a romantic way or quite the oposite. I let you to decide

Spit it Out

At any given moment the brain has 40 bilion neurons firing at the speed of 450 km/h. We don't have control over most of them when we get a chill, when you get excited, adreline. (oh yeah, i did my homework)

The body naturally fallows its impulsives which i think is part of what it makes it so hard for us to control ours. Of course sometimes we have impulses we would rather not control that we later wish we had.

Well, body is a slave of its impulsives but the thing that makes us human is what we can control.

However, i think we should be impulses as much as we can, because, the way i see things, most of the time you stop yourself from doing something you're about to do, it doesn't make any difference. If you choose not to do it, then you're being an hipocrate to yourself and that' not good.
You should look at this like this, after the storm, after the rush, after the hit of the moment has passed you can clean up the messes you've made..
We should be genuin [as much as we can] and stop to try to please/get along with everyone..

Worth living

Three passions have governed my life:
The longings for love, the search for knowledge,
And unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind].

Love brings ecstasy and relieves loneliness.
In the union of love I have seen
In a mystic miniature the prefiguring vision
Of the heavens that saints and poets have imagined.

With equal passion I have sought knowledge.
I have wished to understand the hearts of [people].
I have wished to know why the stars shine.

Love and knowledge led upwards to the heavens,
But always pity brought me back to earth;
Cries of pain reverberated in my heart
Of children in famine, of victims tortured
And of old people left helpless.
I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot,
And I too suffer.

This has been my life; I found it worth living.

Bertrand Russel

Confession

I HATE PHYSICS!!!!!!

Women Up

I'm someone often considered by others as hard to deal with (statements i do NOT stand for).
Today, i challenged myself as a way to move foward. I've officially Womened Up!!
I ignored all my stupid natural instints and went for it! I did speak my mind out loud and, not only it felt good, but i got congratuladed in the end, which it is always good to hear. Now, i just want you to understand i do tell the truth as often as i am asked to but you should know there are some..let's call it hostel situations, in which i don't talk at all...so this particular situation was a huge victory!!

To all women in the world, i appeal to you to Women Up. Truth is, if god did such a great job with his criations, he should have never put women below man and history proves it did happen. Once we started this race a little bit later than we should have, we need to catch up. We need to kick those who diminute us asses really hard!...and guess what, WE CAN SUCCEED!!

Women Up, prove God wrong and most important of all, prove me right! (come on girls, i'm counting on you)

[i'm in a really good mood...]